


It's All Over (Except the Shouting)

by karrenia_rune



Category: Alice In Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-17
Updated: 2011-05-17
Packaged: 2017-10-19 12:00:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/200625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karrenia_rune/pseuds/karrenia_rune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just like that old Gershwin tune: Does the punishment fit the crime?</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's All Over (Except the Shouting)

Title: It's All Over (Except for the Shouting)  
Fandom: Alice in Wonderland, general book series  
Author: karrenia  
Rating: General Audiences  
Characters: The Jack of Hearts, King of Hearts, cameo by the Queen of Hearts  
Prompt: #46 mistake  
Words: 689  
Disclaimer: the Alice in Wonderland universe and characters are the original creations of Lewis Carroll and belong to the original author and whoever owns his estate now; they are not mine. Written for the live journal community 50 scenes, prompt #46, mistake, Table 1.

"It's All Over, Except for the Shouting" by karrenia

Just how much of a cry and furor that had resulted from the theft of the baked goods was in direct relation to their origin? Sometimes he wondered if there would have been as much fuss made over their disappearance and eventually recovery if they had say, been made at a humble bakery instead of by the Royal Bakery. Or it maybe it was the tarts ingredients that made them so special, if they had been made with currants instead of strawberry jam, he might have gotten off with a slap on the wrist and a warning.

Once the theft had been discovered, the Jack of Hearts had quite literally been caught red-handed, his face crimson from both shame and the smear of strawberry jam that coated his lips, cheeks, and mouth.

The Jack of Hearts dropped the pan now mostly empty and in the act crumbs spilled all over the immaculately crisp and sun-dappled lawn of the croquet playing field. He looked all around, not for an escape route, for he had known right then, as he had known growing up, that theft of pies, tarts, and other assorted baked goods was not something that he could long get away with it without someone eventually catching on.

The King of Hearts, and other members of the royal court appeared to be not so much even paying attention as they were like a flock of jay birds attracted by the activity, regardless of who or what might be involved.

The Queen of Hearts had her feet planted wide apart, fists planted on her massive hips, skirts swirling in both the wind that blew in from the east and the swiftness of her own passage across the lawn.

Looking down in a apoplexy of rage, she sucked in a deep breath and seemed poised to deliver her usual sentence. The Jack of Hearts feared that those confounded tarts would now become his last meal, and mentally prepared himself to experience the novel sensation of having his head separated from his body.

It seemed then just as he felt prepared for the finality, when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder and he blinked and opened his eyes, to discover that he was still very much alive and the only other person in immediate sight was the King of Hearts.

The older man stood with his somewhat owlish and bewildered face pressed up against the bars of a cell. "Shh.' the older man said.

"I must think you are surprised to find yourself here, are you not?" A voice muttered from the darkness that had swept over him after a bout of dizziness, and much of the circumstances had gone by a big gray blur.

"I must admit to that," replied the Jack of Hearts shaking all over with both relief and released tension.

"I came to inform you, that for both your regard of distinguished service to the royal court and having convinced my wife of the, shall we say, the minor quality of your infraction, The King of Hearts sighed and offered the younger man a trembling little smile. "I talked her into clemency."

"Well, I must say, sire," the Jack of Hearts replied as he stood up, shaking a little on his jittery legs and felt a bit dizzy on his feet. "I must thank you for your intercession on my behalf."

"No, no, my boy, no thanks are necessary," The King of Hearts sighed waving a hand.

"If I may ask, how soon will I be released from here?" asked the Jack of Hearts.

"Oh, soon, I should think," replied the older man. "I was never good with mathematics, too many numbers to hold all together in my head," he trailed off.

"Carry the on, multiply by two,, he muttered as he held up his hands to the sparse light that filtered in through the high narrow windows of the cell. "I must have made a mistake somewhere," he replied as he then did an about face in order to address the young man.

"In about 72 hours, if my math learning has not completely deserted me."


End file.
